


this was a therapeutic chain of events

by scorpiusismypatronus



Category: Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson
Genre: I HURT MY ANKLE, I like to call this one ‘how much sarcasm can I apply to a serious situation’, IT WAS 45 MINUTES, M/M, MY ANKLE WAS NEAR BROKEN, She's adopted, Suicide Attempt, U KNOW HOW LONG THE CAR RIDE WAS??, Ugh, in this fic he's got an older lesbian sister, jared had a little brother who died, jared! is! just! as! insecure! as! evan!, to the hospital i mean, uM WHEN I WAS IN 8TH GRADE, wow canon divergence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-02
Updated: 2018-04-02
Packaged: 2019-04-17 08:27:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,553
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14184921
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/scorpiusismypatronus/pseuds/scorpiusismypatronus
Summary: Jared finds Evan after his suicide attempt





	this was a therapeutic chain of events

**Author's Note:**

> title from camisado by p!atd

Jared wasn’t supposed to be here. He was aware of that. But it was 7pm on a Sunday and he was tired and sad and lonely and the pills hadn’t worked and nothing was working and he was alone. So, Ellison State Park it was. 

He adjusted his backpack and stared down at his Converse, wondering if anyone would notice or care if he lived out the rest of his admittedly short life right here in this overly yellow field.

He was having _such_ a great time, he really was, thinking about how reason said he should’ve died three weeks ago and the fact that literally no one wanted him around. 

But the thing is, noticing a body crumpled under a tree tends to be a bit disconcerting. And disturbing. _And it really sucks the joy out of wallowing in life’s misery_ , Jared contemplated, but he broke into a run upon seeing the body. Were they alive? Who knew. It was a horrifying thought and Jared felt his heart beat faster.

…He really couldn’t catch a break, could he?

The body crumpled at the base of the tree was none other than Evan _fucking_ Hansen, his long term family friend and almost-just-as-long term crush.

“Evan?”

The boy didn’t move for a second, but then he turned. His face was oddly calm for someone who’d seemed dead from twenty yards away. “Jared?”

“Hi,” Jared said stupidly. “You, uh, merging with the ground or something in some kinda, fuckin’, spiritual yoga?” Not his best line, whatever. He was still kind of in shock.

“No,” Evan said. Looking closer, Jared could see a grimace on his face. He bent down, kneeling down next to the other boy, knowing he was getting his knees muddy but not really caring.

“Why are you…” Jared gestured to nothing, to everything. _Nice going, Jared, maybe learn how to use a fucking sentence at some point_!

“I fell,” Evan said.

“What?”

“Out of the tree.”

Now that he mentioned it, his left arm _was_ bent at an odd angle. “Shit, you alright?”

“I hurt my arm,” Evan said.

“Do you want, like, help, or…” Jared was still trying to sound like an asshole, but it was getting more and more difficult because his heart was racing and blood was pounding in his head and anxiety had taken over every inch of his body.

“I don’t wanna — I don’t know if you were — doing something?”

“I'm wandering around an empty park at seven on a Sunday, illegally, wallowing in my own misery. Trust me, you’re not interrupting much. What do you need?”

“Would you — and you don’t have to — just — could you drive me to the ER?”

“‘Course,” Jared said, holding out an arm. “Can you get up?”

Evan took his hand with his unhurt arm, wincing as he stood. “Yes, but it hurts like a bitch to move.”

“I don’t know how to help,” Jared said apologetically. “Would a distraction help at all?”

“Sure,” Evan said. “Yeah.”

“So,” Jared said. “I went to computer camp this summer, right, and there was this huge-ass vending machine. We’re talking big.” He adjusted his backpack and tried to keep up with Evan’s longer strides. “I really wanted some Mountain Dew, because I’m a growing boy.”

“You haven’t gotten taller since 7th grade.”

Jared laughed. “Oh, fuck off.” He pulled himself up to his full height of four-foot-ten to stick his tongue out before continuing, “We'd been talking about hacking and shit that day and I really wanted some fucking Mountain Dew.”

“Understandable.” 

“Thank you. So we had our, uh, the, the things. They’re, like, fuckin’ necklaces? Uh… lanyards! And they got those, uh, the cards? To help you get in the building?”

“Key cards?”

“Yes! Thank you. We had those, and I managed to jam mine into the slot for money, and it thought it was a dollar bill, so for the rest of the summer I got as much free shit as I want.”

“Not exactly legal, but very smart,” Evan commented.

“And delicious,” Jared grinned. 

The two of them approached the gate and Evan pulled his key card out, slipping it through and pushing open the gate.

“You work here?” Jared asked.

“Yeah. Summer job,” Evan said, now cradling his arm to his chest. 

“Cool,” Jared said. “I did literally nothing over the summer. Well, no, that’s not true, I worked at an ice cream place for a week at this church before getting fired, but I’m trying to block it out.”

“Why’d you get fired?” Evan asked.

Jared hit a button on his car keys and opened Evan’s door for him, waiting until the other boy had gotten in so he could buckle his seatbelt. He tried not to think about how close they were, or the fact that Evan smelled like pine and ice cream and strawberries.

“Thanks,” Evan said.

“‘Course,” Jared responded, walking around the car to the driver’s seat. “What was your question again?” He remembered Evan’s question. He just hoped Evan didn’t.

“Why you got fired?”

“Oh, uh…” Jared wracked his mind for anything other than the truth but came up blank. “Yeah, uh, it was this really fucking conservative place, right, ‘cause I was working in a church. So I'm chilling on my lunch break on Twitter, retweeting memes, just a dude being a bro, and I’m retweeting this, uh, fuckin,’” he started the car, the rumble of the engine helping him relax. “i was tweeting this pride meme, right, ‘cause it’s the end of June, and it’s like ‘ _ugh, heterosexuals,_ ’ literally _nothing_ incriminating, but you know what they fucking fire me for? Discrimination against heterosexuals. Direct fucking quote.”

“That’s not how discrimination _fucking_ works,” Evan raged. “This is exactly why the heterosexuals _need_ to be oppressed.”

Jared snorted at both the comment and the hope growing in his chest at the idea of Evan being not-straight and maybe, possibly into him. “Mood.” He took a hard left and slipped his phone out of his pocket. “Hey, could you pull up the GPS and type in the hospital? The password’s 3826.” He could always _hope_ that Evan wouldn’t pick up on the fact that it was his name in number form.

“No, what the hell, that’s mine too,” Evan gasped, then flinched. “Oh, ow, shit.”

“I'm sorry,” Jared attempted to soothe him, pressing down on the gas pedal a little harder, speed limits be damned. 

Evan fiddled with the phone for a second before it said, “Finding route to Hope Hospital. In 500 feet, turn left onto Lafayette Street.”

“How long does it say until we get there?” Jared asked anxiously.

“Uh, fourteen minutes.”

“M’kay.” Jared pressed his lips together, trying to think of a conversation topic. “So, why were you, uh, in a tree?”

“I just wanted to climb one,” Evan shrugged. 

“How high’d you fall from?” 

Evan shrugged again. “Like, forty feet, maybe?”

“Holy shit,” Jared said. _Zoom in on my sophomore year search histor_ y, he thought bitterly. “Five more feet and you probably would’ve died.”

Evan opened his mouth, closed it again, then said, “How do you know that?”

“I've got way too much free time,” he said, non-committal.

“No joke, you managed to hack a vending machine. I didn't even know that was possible.”

“That’s fair, that’s fair,” Jared said.

“So, uh, how was your summer?” Evan asked, fidgeting with the hem of his shirt.

He opened his mouth to spit out the lie he’d come up with — _I got to second base with an Israeli girl at camp, my camp friends are doing amazing, I won capture the flag, very heterosexual, much wow_ — but realized how easily Evan would see through the lie. “Yeah, uh, my bunk won capture the flag at camp and my older sister disowned herself, so it’s been great.” Fuck, he wasn’t gonna—

“Rachel? What happened?” Evan asked. Jared found himself melting at the fact that Evan remembered his sister’s name, even though he barely talked about her. Jesus fuck, he was in way too deep.

“Yeah, she’s a lesbian and my parents were like _no, fuck you, go to church_ — not in those words, obviously. And my sister was like _no, fuck you, go to a lesbian orgy_ — again, not in those words. And she left.”

“Damn,” Evan said. “So do your parents just not have straight kids?”

“Apparently,” Jared shrugged. “I mean, at least they have a kid who likes girls and a kid who likes boys, so…”

“They did get what they expected, I guess,” Evan smiled. “In a way.”

“True, true,” Jared said. “Although, minus one kid.”

“I’m sorry,” Evan mumbled.

“It’s not your fault,” Jared huffed fondly. “He died as an infant. They didn’t have time to project their heterosexuality.”

“I know. But still.”

“I miss him,” Jared admitted. He didn't know why he did it. “Like, God, I didn't even know the kid, and yet, here I am.” He snorted sardonically. “Wishing he was here again.”

“He would’ve loved you,” Evan said. “I promise you.”

“We’re here,” said Jared, turning off the road and into the ER parking lot. _That’s enough emotions for today, boys_. “I’ll go in with you, God knows you’ll need company.”

“Thanks,” Evan mumbled, suddenly back to his stuttering, anxious self.

“‘Course,” Jared said. “No problem.”


End file.
